


No Pranks Tonight, Professors

by DustySoul



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Awkward Conversations, Ballroom Dancing, Cuddling & Snuggling, Disabled Character, First Kiss, Gen, Kissing, M/M, Physical Disability, Sharing a Bed, Shirtless, and Peter doesn't really exist, whoops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-10
Updated: 2014-05-10
Packaged: 2018-01-24 05:31:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1593356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DustySoul/pseuds/DustySoul
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Hogwarts has a ball the night after the full moon. Remus begs Pomfrey to let him go and fails spectacularly at avoiding excitement.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Pranks Tonight, Professors

**Author's Note:**

> Not beta-ed so all spelling and grammar shenanigans are my own.

“I wouldn’t be surprised to find that sheer stubbornness and will power did more for you than magic.”

“I want to go to the ball, Madam Pomfrey.”

She tidied the small pile of chocolates his friends gave him, “I don’t want you walking up to Gryffindor tower more than once tonight, so someone else will have to fetch your dress robes-”

“Sirius is bringing them.”

“Good, and bring your cane, and don’t stay on your feet to long, and don’t cause trouble. Alright, then?”

“Thank you.”

She wandered off to her office. Remus stretched his back. The newly grown skin complained and itched. He exhaled, leaned back against his pillow, and stared out the open window.

The last light had faded just a few hours before. The moon was almost a perfect orb, just a small sliver on the left side was missing. It was the most complete Remus could ever see it, and it illuminated the castle like a fairy tale. The lights in the great hall flickered as if they were laughing, casting dancing shadows over the lawn. The moon didn’t care, didn’t smile, didn’t even notice.

He closed his eyes, breathed in the smell of spring and midnight, and fancied, that if he strained his ears, he could hear the faint sound of music from bellow.

 

Sirius entered, his crimson dress robes flowing around him. “Remus!” He called. “Oh, there you are. I have something for you.” He handed over the paper wrapped bundle.

Remus tore into it, “Pomfrey’s letting me go.” He sat up, cracked his neck.

“Good, I thought I might have to rescue you from the dragon’s lair.” Sirius teased.

Remus swatted him with the tie he just unearthed, “Haha, you’re very funny. Now go wait outside, I’ll be changed in a minute.”

Sirius nipped some of the sweets from Remus’ bed side, and waved good-bye.

Sirius, or maybe James, had made some last minute transfigurations to the robes. The color, which was originally a purple so vibrant it hardly looked second hand, was now deep blue. Only the slight thinning of the fabric around the elbows and sleeves gave it away. Embroidered and beaded constellations spread across the back and shoulders. He’d asked that they help him make the buttons bigger, and fix some missing threading and pilling but the rest of it...

He’d have to thank Sirius, or James, who’d ever done it.

His cane was still worn, the grip lighter and smoother than the rest of it, the polish faded. He didn’t mind in the least, and knew the other students wouldn’t notice it’s second-hand condition.

Remus strolled out of the infirmary, beaming.   
Sirius was scuffing his shoes, dress shoes, not sneakers, across the flagstones when Remus’ greeted him.

“You ready?” Sirius asked, stilling his foot.

“Yes, you shouldn’t bother waiting for me, it’s going to take me a bit to get down the stairs.”

“It’s fine, I’ll walk with you. Besides, it’s going to be all rock and roll for at least another quarter hour, and I’ve had enough of Celestina Warbeck. Then it’ll all be waltzes and slow dancing, trying to scare off anyone who’ll dance till dawn, I rekon.”

Moony guffaw, “Till dawn? Is anyone really doing that?”

“James was saying something about it.” Sirius shrugged, “But I saw him and Lily in the common room snogging, so I guess he changed his mind.” He grinned.

They walked a while in silence, just their foot steps and the clack of Remus’ cane.

“You look good.” Sirius said a while later, half turning to him. “Clean up well, and all.”

“Thank you,” Remus turned his face away, the tips of his ears burning. “I noticed the embroidery.” He ran a finger across Canis Major, avoiding looking at Sirius. “Did you do that?”

“I did. Well, it was my idea, and I did most of the work. But I asked James to help with the last bits, make sure the beads stay on and the thread doesn’t fall apart.”

“You did a good job. You’re transfigurations really are fantastic.”

“Thank you.”

“So, have you been dancing tonight?” Remus asked as the strains of music - something from Swan Lake - became audible.

He shrugged, “Not really, all the teachers think I’ve been planning some great prank.” He grinned.

Remus smiled, “But why not, you like dancing, don’t you?”  
“Course I do, but I couldn’t stop thinking about my best mate up in the hospital wing all by himself.”

“I wasn’t missing out on anything, it would have been too high-energy for me. You should have gone dancing if you’d have enjoyed it.”

“Don’t think I would have.” Sirius muttered.

The doors to the great hall loomed in front of them, “Well, here we are,” Remus said, “I’ll give it a minute, maybe less, for someone to come over and ask for a dance.”

“Not going to bet against that.”

It was forty-six seconds from them entering the great hall for a girl, hufflepuff, small and mousy, to ask Sirius.

“Not right now.” Sirius deflected, “I want to make sure my friend is well.”

She turned to Remus, “Oh, are you alright you look-” she stopped herself.

Sirius smirked from behind her.

“I’m fine, just a little under the weather.” He said.

“Have a seat, I’ll get you something to drink.” Sirius whispered as the Hufflepuff retreated.

“You and James didn’t spike the punch?”

“Well we agreed, didn’t we? No pranks, or else the teachers will give us all twice the detention. Besides, that’s predictable.”

Remus chuckled, “Alright then.”He took a seat at the edge of the room, right under one of the open windows.

The whole room some how seemed larger, grander. Flowers, orchids, roses and daffodils were suspended from the ceiling, the candles replaced by fire fly like lights. The seemed to move like little dancers up in the sky, circling around each other and the bouquets.  Chairs lined the walls and the tables had all been moved off to the side, creating a small buffet of orderves and drinks. The rest had been magicked away.  The whole room smelled like rain and spring. Whenever the breeze joined the dancers, Remus could smell the forest, soil and magic. He closed his eyes for a while, existing, breathing, feeling.

When he opened them again he caught sight of Sirius, holding a plate of food and a stemmed glass, trying to extract himself from the grip of a girl Remus’ didn’t recognize without spilling anything. He gestured to the food, then to Remus, then himself. The girl let him go. He weaved his way over to Remus.

“Let’s go outside, alright.” Sirius said, “I’m tired of all the attention.”

“Never thought I’d hear you say something like that.”

“Like what?”

“That you’re tired of attention.”

Sirius rolled his eyes and lead the way into the grounds which were alive with fire flies charmed to glow a variety of colors, red and pink and purple chief among them, instead of their standard yellow-green. Remus smiled. The midnight and forest smell was stronger here, it was wild here. He was free here. Home here.

Sirius touched his elbow, “This way, I know of a statue you’ll like.”

\---

Slughorn bustled up to professor McGonagall to titters from the students around him. He shot them scathing looks. “Sirius and Remus are here.” He addressed the head of Gryffindor house.

“Yes, professor, I wasn’t about to ban them for something they haven’t even done.”

“Yes, yes, but that’s not what I meant! They’ve gone and slunk off somewhere, up to no good.”

“Just because you’ve lost track of them doesn’t mean they’re breaking rules-”

“Professor, I saw them leave for the grounds, together. They’re probably going to- going to- blow up hedges! Or something worse.”

“You have no faith in my students.”

“They’ve given me to have ‘faith’ in them.”

McGonagall bit on a smile as the last, and arguably greatest, of the groups prank against the Slytherins came to her. Slughorn had been a vibrant shade of olive green for two weeks.

“You have to admit it’s dubious. They’re up to something, professor. We have to find them before they cause any mahem.”

“They promised they wouldn’t disrupt the ball. They know the consequences for doing so.”

“They know the consequences for getting caught! And how many other countless promises have they broken. Professor-”

“Very well!” She snapped, the students scattered around her, not wanting to be the ones to face her wrath. Slughorn struggled to keep up.

\---

Sirius led him to a circle of rose bushes. A statue of a wolf pack, the leader howling to the moon, the rest with their heads bowed, sniffing at the ground, in the center. Remus sat on the statues’ base, resting his cane beside him. Sirius leaned against one of the wolves, stroking it’s down turn face.

“Beautiful.” Remus whispered.

“Very.” Sirius was looking at him.

“I almost forgot the moon could be so full.” He stared at it, as the wolf leader stared at it.

Sirius hummed. “Invitation To The Dance”emanated from the great hall.

They sat in silence, listening, not looking at each other, looking at each other. Remus eating the food, passing the goblet back and forth, careless in drinking from the same part of the rim.

“You’re eyes are almost the color of the moon.”

Remus smiled and looked to the ground. He ran his finger around the lip of the glass. It sang gently for him. “Thank you.”

“I mean it.”

“I know.” Remus looked to Sirius, we was watching him, intently, almost fearfully. “You put Canis Major over my heart.”

Sirius nodded, bowing his head away from Remus for the first time.

“Come closer?” Remus asked, ungraceful without his cane.

Sirius edged closer, returned to looking at him, staring into his eyes.

Remus’ breath caught, “You left the dance to come and get me-”

“I didn’t want to dance with any of them, not a big deal.”

Remus’ lips twitched. He licked them. “Walked all the way up to the tower than the hospital wing-”

“Was worth it, for you to be here.”

“C-can I kiss you, Sir-”

Sirius cut him off, leaning over the rest of the way, brushing their lips together. They barely touched, breath ghosting over each other’s mouths. Then Sirius’ glided his tongue across Remus’ bottom lip and Remus’ started, moaned, opened his mouth. And Sirius was good at this. He tasted sweet, like the punch, and smelled like worn leather and rosemary.

It became sloppy and heated. One of Sirius’ hand tangled in Remus’ hair, the other played across his thigh. It was comfortable, good. Remus wondered just how far it would go, groaning as Sirius’ did something particularly spectacular with his mouth. Would he want to be one of those couples pawing at each other in a less thorny flower bush?

Horace Slughorn crashed into their little world right then, hollering, “Found them McGonigal!”

Sirius pulled back at once, Remus thrown off balance. His face was burning and the world was spinning.

Slughorn spluttered and spit for several seconds, it was almost comical. Until he started yelling, “Vile! Disgusting! Improper, I’d have thought better from you, Mr. Lupin, to engage in such- in such lewd behavior. And Mr. Black! You’re mother should have-”

“Slughorn!” McGonigal strode into the clearing, mouth thin and jaw clenched, “I’ll thank you not to antagonize my students. You’re making a scene. I’ll take them from here-”

Slughorn protested, “A scene! A scene! Me?! A scene!” He gestured at Remus and Sirius who were trying to look like they hadn’t just been sucking each other’s faces off.

“They are in my house and I am responsible for any disciplinary action while they are out of class. Now go!” McGonigal watched him fume up the path before turning on the boys, “You, my office, now.”

They slunk after her, all the way up to Gryffindor tower. Remus was out of breath when he finally collapsed in a seat across her desk.

“Alright then, what did you two do?” McGonagall sat in front of them.

“Nothing.” They said in unision.

“I haven’t heard that one before.” She said dryly. “What would Slughorn say you’d done?”

They exchanged guilty looks.

“Nothing” Remus started, “That’s explicitly against the rules. Nothing that would harm or humiliate anyone. You can search the grounds and great hall and castle and find no prank.”

Sirius fidget, nodded slowly.

“You’re usually much better liars, I’m disappointed-”

“He’s telling the truth. We weren’t pulling a prank. Wouldn’t want to get Pete and James in trouble if they weren’t in on the mischief.”

“Hmm, that’s something I almost believe. So note, if you have set a prank for this night, the rule for twice detentions for the four of you still applies, but we’ll make it triple for you two.”

“There is no prank.”

“Good, then it shouldn’t matter. Now go up to the tower before Slughorn can accuse you of anything else.”

“Goodnight then, Professor.”

“Goodnight, Lupin.”

“Night.”

“Goodnight, Black.”

\---

Professor Slughorn, red faced and panting, hammered on McGonagall’s door.

She sighed when she opened it, “I don’t want to hear anymore of the matter, Professor. We shall see if they’ve created any mischief in the morning. Are we clear?”

“I’m not here for that! I need to inform you of the foul behavior of your students-”

“Black and Lupin?”

“Yes! Yes, Black and Lupin-”

“Weren’t up to anything, as far as I-”

“They were off in the garden, Professor.”

“Which is not an area out of bounds to students! They haven’t broken any rules and I’m tired of-”

“This is about conduct, not rules.”

“If you are going to chase misconduct, I suggest you start with your own house and the dark arts gang.”

“They’re hardly a gang, professor.”

“My point still stands, I will not punish Lupin or Black for minor jinxes while Snape and your other students throw curses. Especially if there is no evidence that they have done so.” Slughorn spluttered, “And I don’t want to hear it, now get out of my office.”

“But McGonigal!”

“Go.”  

\---

Once in the dormitory, empty even though it was past midnight, they curled up in Remus’ bed. The drapes pulled in around them.

“Do you think Slughorn will tell her?” Sirius asked.

“I don’t think he could bring himself to say such a thing.” Remus huffed a little laugh. “Are you worried, about people knowing?”

“Yeah, no one takes this type of thing well, you know.”

“James took my furry little problem okay. Peter, too. Do you think we should tell them?”

Sirius shrugged, “I don’t know. Seems a little soon, you know? It all seems... very sudden. I’m half convinced I’ll wake up in the morning and none of it will have happened.” He ran his fingers over  the scars on Remus’ chest.

Remus kissed his forehead, “I’m sure James and Peter will figure it out eventually.”

Sirius kissed his neck, “I’m worried.”

“Me too.”

“I’m you worried that-”

“Hmm?”

Sirius traced one of Remus’ scars, “That it’s you know, that we’re getting into this too quick. Do- do you think?”

Remus hummed, “A lots changed in one night, but that’s how things go for us. One night I’m a monster, the next I’m not. One moment you’re a big black dog, the next you’re a man. It just seems to be how it goes.”

“S-since when? Since when have you liked me like this?”

“I realized that I liked blokes in year three, and in year four I realized I liked you.”

“Year four?” Sirius whispered.

“Yeah, when was it for you?”

“I mean, I always liked you, thought you were special. I didn’t really know, know until after that thing with the willow.”

Remus tensed.

“I realized,” Sirius continued, “once I thought I’d lost you, just how much you meant to me. And I thought to myself, ‘I can’t tell him now. He’ll just think I’m trying to guilt him into forgiving me.’ Besides, I knew we had to repair our friendship first, trust and all that.”

Remus drew circles in his shoulder.

“Moony, I-”

“What?”

“Nevermind, I-I just... I had a good night.”

“Me too.”

\---

James crashed into the dorm several hours later, hollering, “Sirius! Sirius, guess what. Sirius! Lily kissed me.”

A sloth could not have slept through the racket, and two teenage boys jammed into a bed made for one had no hope.

Sirius grumbled, inaudible to James. He sighed, “Not a dream then.” And ran his lips across Remus’ clenched jaw.

“James he’s-”

“I know.” Sirius whispered, and kissed Moony on the mouth.

James pulled back Sirius’ bed curtains, still going on about Lily. “Oh.” He said to the Sirius free bed. He strode over the Remus’ tripping only a little bit. “Remus! Remus! Lily she-” He threw back Remus’ curtains.

“Kissed you-” Remus yawned, “-yeah, I heard. Saw, you were -- really going at it.” He opened his eyes.

James was flushed and beaming, hair in even more disarray than usual. “Yes, she’s such a good dancer. Her hair looked like it was on fire.” He flopped onto his own bed, across from Remus, “She wanted to do nothing but dance with me all night.”

“Doubt it.” Sirius grumbled.

James sat up suddenly, “What do you mean?”

Sirius snickered, “Looked like she wanted your tongue down her throat. You’ll have to remind me why h-h-her -- swapping spit after a month of going to with you is so damn important.” He yawned again.

“A month and a half.”

Remus laughed, a little breathless, heart pounding.

“And it’s important because it’s our first kiss.”

“Congratulations, James.”

“See? See Sirius? Moony get’s it. Thank you Remus.”

“And what’s so special about first kisses?”

“It’s not a first kiss. It’s a first kiss with Lily Evans. That’s what so special. It was ours, our first ever kiss. Sirius, that means something.”

Sirius looked disgruntled, his nose scrunched up and forehead knitted together. Remus burst out laughing and tossed the covers over his head.

“What’s gotten into him.”

Sirius shrugged, “No idea.”

“You’re just jealous because Slughorn interrupted ours.” Remus whispered.

Sirius bit back a smile.

“What is it?” James demanded, “What’s so funny? What is it?”

“It’s nothing, Prongs. Just that it’s-” Sirius pushed himself up and craned around to read the grandfather clock in the corner, “Th-th-three” he yawned, “fucking thirty in the morning and you thought this couldn’t wait until after breakfast.” He lay back down.

Remus emerged from under his covers. James was staring at him, at them actually.

“Sirius, why aren’t you wearing a shirt?”

Sirius looked down at his chest, bewildered. “I don’t normally wear them-” the ending ‘when I sleep’ fading away.

“And why aren’t you in your own bed?” James stood, looking down at them.

Sirius and Remus were both aware of just how small Remus’ bed was, and of every point of contact shared between them. Sirius’ arm pinned under Remus’ back, their feet tangled together, and legs pressed into legs.

“Remus? Sirius? What’s going on?”

Remus fought back the absurd desire to say, ‘I swear, it’s not what it looks like.’

Sirius seemed stunned by the bizzar three a.m. conversation as a whole. He kept opening and closing his mouth. “Well, right now” He said slowly, “we are experiencing an unexpected and slightly awkward laps in your blathering about Lily Evans and how great she is at snogging.”

“I don’t blather.”

“You were and you do.” Remus confirmed, “At three in the morning, waking everyone up.”

“You-you, oh, you were sleeping then.”

“Yes. And you barged in quite rudely, actually.”

“Oh, um, yeah, sorry about that.”

Remus grunted, eyes closed.

“Okay. Um. Are you, um, at least wearing trousers?”

“Go to sleep James.” Remus growled.

“Okay, okay, but like, you and Sirius...?”

“Would really like it if anymore talk of swapping spit was left for the morning.”

James eyes got wider, if that was possible, “You’ve kissed him, then?”

“Yes.” They said in unison.

“And then Slughorn barged in on us.” Remus stated.

“He said it was very vulgar.”

“Well you weren’t like, shoving your hands down each other’s robes. Where you?”

“No!” Remus threw his spare pillow at James. It hit him in the face.

“Were getting there.” Sirius grumbled.

Remus elbowed him in the ribs.

“You’re, you’re really together then?”

“Yes.”

“Since when?”

“Tonight.” Remus supplied, “Which means it’s all been stressful and exhausting and I would very much like to get at least four hours of sleep for all the trouble.”

“Sleep in.”

“Mmm, wasn’t planning on it.”

“Oh. Alright.” James jumped back into his bed, “Just, silencing spells, very useful and all.”

Remus burst out laughing once more.

Peter walked in then, lip busted. He looked to James, then Remus, then Sirius, then Remus, and then addressed James, “What the hell?”

“Lily kissed me.” James smirked.

“Okay, but why are Remus and Sirius um- um- um doing- doing that. And um, are they naked?”

Remus moaned, “I’ll explain in the morning Pete, just go to sleep.”

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to message or follow me on tumblr at dusty-soul.tumblr.com


End file.
